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 tagalog jokes

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noid
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Number of posts: 91
Age: 34
Location: QC
Registration date: 2007-10-25

PostSubject: tagalog jokes   Sun 25 Nov 2007, 16:22

Bahay Kubo (Bading Version)

Valer kuberch Kahit jutay Ang julamantrax donchi Ay anek-anek Nyongkamas at nutring Nyogarilyas at kipay Nyitaw, nyotaw, jutani Kundol, jutola Jupot jolabastquax At mega join-join pa Jobanox nyustasa Nyubuyax, nyomatis Nyowang at luyax And around the keme ay fullness ng lingax!
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ashle
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Age: 26
Location: zamboanga city
Registration date: 2007-11-29

PostSubject: Re: tagalog jokes   Fri 30 Nov 2007, 20:31

GINABI

Ginabi ang dalaga sa pag-uwi...
Dalaga: 'Nay pasensya na kayo hah ginabi ako kasi kinain ko pa
ang cheesedog ng boyfriend ko eh !!
Nanay: Wala yon anak, totoo naman eh may mayonaise pa
nga ang labi mo eh !....
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noid
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Registration date: 2007-10-25

PostSubject: Re: tagalog jokes   Thu 06 Dec 2007, 07:06

APOY AT BATO

Nagpahula ang mag-ina kay Madam Auring....

Madam Auring: Bukas mamamatay ang anak mo sa apoy at bato.

Mag-ina: Naku! Umuwi na tayo at mag-ingat tayo, baka pa tayo maaksidente.

Kinabukasan. Galit na galit ang ina, pinuntahan niya ang manghuhula.

Sabi ng ina: Sabi mo mamamatay ang anak ko sa apoy at bato, bakit nasagasaan?

Madam Auring
: Huminahon ka, puntahan natin ang lugar ng aksidente.

Pinuntahan nga nila.

Madam Auring: Sabi ko na nga ba at mamamatay siya sa apoy at bato.

Ina: Ano? Nakikita mo bang nasagasaan siya, tapos sasabihin mong apoy at bato?

Madam Auring: Tingnan mo nga ang gulong na nakasagasa: FIRESTONE!!!
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Emo_kid
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Number of posts: 15
Age: 21
Location: zamboanga city
Registration date: 2007-12-01

PostSubject: Re: tagalog jokes   Fri 07 Dec 2007, 02:43

letrang s

ANAK : Tays ! kakains nas tayos !
TATAY : Hoy ! Tigilan mo yang kalalagay mo ng ' S '
sa mga sinasabi mo ha ! Ano ba ang ulam ?
ANAK: BANGU na may KAMATI, ARDINA na may IBUYA !
*****

higit pa

Husband: Lagi mo pala dinadala ang picture ko sa bag
mo pag pumapasok ka sa office. Baket?
Wife: Pag may problema ko, kahit gaano kabigat,
nawawala kapag nakikita ko ang picture mo.
Husband: Sabi ko na nga ba talagang mahal na mahal
mo ko.
Wife:Tinitingnan ko lang ang picture mo tapos sinasabi
ko sa sarili ko na WALA NG PROBLEMA NA MAS HIHIGIT
PA DITO.
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meldz
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Number of posts: 16
Age: 45
Location: Ipil, PH
Registration date: 2007-10-25

PostSubject: Re: tagalog jokes   Sun 09 Dec 2007, 00:54

Pasikatan ng Graduates

UP: A number of past Philippine presidents graduated from UP. Presidents oxas, Quirino, Laurel, Garcia and Marcos, to name just a few!
ATENEO: Hah! That's nothing, a number of Ateneo graduates became national heroes like Jose Rizal, Gen. Gregorio del Pilar, Gen. Antonio Luna, Evelio Javier and many others.
UP: That just goes to show you, UP graduates become presidents and lead countries while Ateneans end up getting shot!
LA SALLE: Wala 'yan. Talo kayo sa mga gradweyt namin!
UP & ATENEO: Bakit sino ba ang mga graduates ninyo?
LA SALLE: Aba! Marami kaming sikat na gradweyts; si Gary Valenciano, Dingdong Avanzado, Ogie Alcasid, Monsour del Rosario, Rico Yan .
-------

Colonial Mentality

Dahil sa nananatiling "Colonial Mentality" ng ating mga kababayan, marami ang nagpapalit ng kanilang mga pangalan matapos silang sumumpa ng kanilang US citizenship. Sa ibaba nito ay mga halimbawa ng mga datihang Pilipino na tuluyan ng itinakwil and kani - kanilang pangalang Pilipino.

Pangalang Pilipino ... Ipinalit sa American Name

1. Restituto Fruto - Tutti Fruti
2. Casimiro Bocaycay - Cashmere Bouquet
3. Rogelio Dagdag - Roger Moore
4. Veneracion De Asis - Venereal Disease
5. Alfonso De Asis - Alzheimer's Disease
6. Topacio Mamaril - Top Gun
7. Francisco Portero - Frank Porter
8. Juanito Lakarin - Johnny Walker
9. Esteban Pagtakhan - Stevie Wonder
10. Leon Mangubat - Tiger Woods
11. Burgos Hari - Burger King
12. Ligaya Almundo - Joy To The World
13. Maria Natividad - Mary Christmas
14. Ligaya Anonuevo - Happy New Year
--------

Speaking Japanese - Filipino/English to Japanese translations:


Manok - Sekken
Mamaya - Sakana
Joke - Biru
Stereo - Akai
Cook - Giza-giza
Ayos - Furo oke
Fingernail - Koko
Laughed - Anata-wa
This - Itto
Small piece of cloth - Retasu
Cornfield - Mais-san
Hindi Masyado - Natsu
Cigarette - Yoshi
Ipagpaumanhin - Kamisori
Is this your property? - Arimoto?
Yes, this is my property.- Arikoto.
Is this yours? - Sayobato?
This is mine. - Sakinitu.
Can I have it? - Akinato?
You can have it. - Sayonato.
Can we have it? - Saminato?
You can have it. - Sanyonato
You've grown so thin! - Kitanabutomo!
We saw each other. - Kitakami.
We had a big get-together. - Kitakitakami.
That was my assumption. - Inakarako.
We will boycott the election. - Kaminoboto.
Are you a victim of discrimination? - Minamatakaba?
I give up. - Sukonako.
Ouch! - Haraiku!
What a sad life it is. - Hainaku.
Is this your car? - Otomoto?
Is this my car? - Otokoto?
Is this your noodles? - Mikimoto?
I'll take this. - Kukuninkoto.
This is my desk. - Itodesko.
Speechless? - Wasabe?
An ampalaya (bittermelon) - Kurukurubot
What are your thoughts? - Kuru-kuromo?
I am thinking. - Munimuniko.
Are you playing the guitar? - Gigitaraka?
Is this your underwear? - Jakeemoto?
Are you annoyed already? - Iniskanabane?
You're crazy!!! - Sirauromo!!!
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